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Showing posts from 2011

Women and Ministry - Again!

I do apologise for the ridiculous length of this blog post: this is really a discussion paper so it will take a little while to read! Feedback here or on Facebook is warmly invited.

Cultural assumptions and reading scripture

One human characteristic is to interpret what we read through the grid of our assumptions and world view. We interpret texts (including the bible) according to the norms of our culture, our family of origin, the style and level of education we have received, and all manner of subtle and not-so-subtle socialisation experiences. We interpret what the church should be like through the grid of our personal experiences of church, often with greater passion and clarity than with anything the New Testament has to say about church. Anyone who has had a battle in their church over hymns versus choruses, where the communion table should sit, how long the service should run, a building program or a management problem, can testify that passions can run high over issues that ha…

Too Quick

TEACHER: Thandeka, go to the map and find North America .
THANDEKA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: THANDEKA.

TEACHER: Rodney, why are you doing your maths multiplication on the floor?
Rodney: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Nathi, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
NATHI: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
NATHI: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Hendrick, what is the chemical formula for water?
HENDRICK: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
HENDRICK: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

TEACHER: Thabiso, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
Thabiso: Me!

TEACHER: Mapula, why do you always get so dirty?
Mapula: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Dipuo, give me a sentence starting with 'I'.
DIPUO: I is..
TEACHER: No, Dipuo..... Alway…

And the Two Shall Become One

I was talking to a friend the other day who has known her husband since her mid-teens. Like me, she has probably passed the half-way mark of her life, and has been with her husband for many years now. She mulled over the fact that if anything happened to her husband, it’s possible she’d remarry, but she knows it would never be the same. There will never be another person who had known her as a young person, who has been her first intimate partner, who has been alongside her through all the ups and downs of life, who has shared her history, who has created a unique home with her, and with whom she has jointly created and parented children.

There is a something about a long-term (and reasonably healthy) marriage that is unlike any other relationship on earth. New relationships may have chemistry galore, but such chemistry inevitably waxes and wanes. In “the Road Less Travelled” M Scott Peck describes falling in love as a “trick”, without which none of us would dare to make the terrifying…

Matthew's Latest Monster Picture

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One good turn deserves another

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.

There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.

'I want to repay you,' said the nobleman. 'You saved my son's life.'

'No, I can't accept payment for what I did,' the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.

'Is that your son?' the nobleman asked.

'Yes,' the farmer replied proudly.

'I'll make you a deal. Let me prov…

Is God a hypocrite?

"Did god who is incapable of sinning, create beings capable of sinning, and then punish them for sinning?

Is god not expecting a higher standard of its creation than it requires of itself?"

The questions above were posed the other day by one of my Facebook friends. I shared an absurdly long answer... thought I'd post it here for your interest:

The response of the Old Testament prophets to accusations toward God was that the pot shouldn't really complain to the potter as it owes its very existence to the potter, hence the proper response is thankfulness. Incidentally, a life filled with thankfulness often has a joyous quality about it which is lacking in those who feel entitled or hard done by. I think this is part of the “narrow road” that leads to abundant life that few find... but that’s another topic of conversation.

The NT answer is something more profound... the incarnation. (Hebrews 4: 15 “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknes…

Another of Matthew's Epic Battle Fantasy Monsters

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They Teach It at Stanford

"I just finished taking an evening class at Stanford. The last lecture was on the mind-body connection - the relationship between stress and disease. The speaker (head of psychiatry at Stanford) said, among other things, that one of the best things that a man could do for his health is to be married to a woman whereas for a woman, one of the best things she could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends.


At first everyone laughed, but he was serious.


Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences. Physically this quality "girlfriend time" helps us to create more serotonin - a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being. Women share feelings whereas men often form relationships around activities. They rarely sit down with a buddy and talk about how they feel about certain things or how their per…

Matthew's Epic Battle Fantasy Pictures

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Amazing Anagrams

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT :
When you rearrange the letters:
I'M A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER