Secret Women's Business

It’s possible to drift in coaching relationships. They can become a pleasant catch up, but be relatively ineffective in helping another grow personally, spiritually, and vocationally. Indeed, they can become frustrating sessions, where old issues are re-hashed with little evidence of increasing maturity or responsibility in the coachee. One of the most important steps in keeping coaching relationships effective is contracting well. Expectations need to be crystal clear, with key goals / growth areas identified at the outset. Some of the expectations that should be built in to a powerful coaching agreement/contract include: * preparation for sessions . The coachee should agree to bring an issue to every session. * commitment to action steps. The coachee is clear s/he desires to grow, and commits to implementing any actions arising from each session. * regular meetings . If meetings are only very occasional or are made on an ad-hoc basis, the coachee may feel little pressure t...

I had an interesting conversation recently with a couple of staff members of a theological college. They said they often had to work hard at convincing women studying "just for interest" or to "help me care for others better", that they could see a gifted vocational minister developing. This was outside of the imagination of many of their female students. Conversely, some of their male students needed help to see that they were not, in fact, the Messiah. Or that at the very least, before they saved the world, God would need to do a deep work in the areas of character, servanthood, and humility.+ I also coached a woman recently who was applying for a senior ministry position. I asked her to role-play speaking to the leadership team about the role she wanted, and what she had to offer. That was interesting. This was my feedback to her: "Don't tell them you're a woman and this could be a problem... they already know that. Don't tell them what y...

Once upon a time, pastoral visits involved reading the bible to people, praying for them, and perhaps sharing communion with the grieving, the sick, or the distressed. The world of pastoral care underwent a significant paradigm shift when insights gained from psychology and counselling were integrated into pastoral care training. As well as providing spiritual resources of prayer and scripture, pastors began to intentionally utilize pastoral listening. Through the discipline and grace-filled gift of listening, comfort, release, clarity and new insights can emerge. This has breathed a helpful dynamic into the spiritual ministry of pastoral care. I’m happy to go out on a limb and claim that coaching training provides the skills needed to embark on a paradigm shift in exercising Christian leadership. It is a paradigm shift that sits perfectly with Churches of Christ ethos on the priesthood of all believers; the belief that fruitful ministry emerges from the Spirit of God stirring up spiri...