Swine Flu

Just phoned the NHS swine flu helpline and all I got was crackling.

How did the pig go on holiday? The swine flu

Swine flu isn’t a problem for pigs, because they're all going to be cured anyway.

The first sign of pig flu is that you come out in nasty rashers.

Swine flu is getting serious, it has been reported to be a hamdemic, which may lead to an aporkolypse... But we’ll get through. Where there's a swill there's a way.

This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed at home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none.
And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1 neuraminidase protein 1.

The only known cure for Swine Flu has been found to be the liberal application of oinkment.

My friend says he’s got swine flu, but I think he's telling porkies

I have to say, I'm finding all these jokes about swine flu pretty boaring.

If you receive an email from the Department of Health telling you not to eat tinned pork because of swine flu, ignore it ............it's just spam.

(I just received this as an email this morning... who makes up all this stuff?)


Anonymous said…
Ha! from a sufferer!! : )
Janet Woodlock said…
Oh, I'm sorry to hear it. The flu isn't nice. I hope you feel better soon.
Amanda Morrice said…
LOL Thanks Janet. I needed that!
Janet Woodlock said…
Thank you... atrocious puns are an email specialty!!!

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